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Apr. 29th, 2011

(no subject)

It's pretty awesome that I've got Mollie and Nori around up here. They're both super awesome to chat with, about boys, life, roommates, work, the future... the bigger and smaller questions in our world. Nori sat me down to write a pro/con list for the fall. I've interviewed with Trinity for board op and haven't heard back yet, but there's a huge amount to weigh between doing more theatre and learning stuff, or staying at ECLPS through the winter and deal with lower hours, but possibly super duper opportunities and an entirely different set of expertise.

Pro/Con list, plus Benji, say I should do Trinity for the season if it's available, 'cause it's good money and a good chance to continue exploring my interests. Production or Design, which do I pick? Who knows. Ew. I've booked two recitals for the summer already, which is cool. It's time to think about packing up and moving, yipes! I get Pnikkiz for the summer and Sarah for the fall, yippeeeee for good ol' roommates!

Time for deener, but I should wait for Janice to wake up so I don't get a lap full of claws. My life is fuckin' awesome. I feel like I can do anything right now, let's start with climbing a few mountains!

Mar. 28th, 2011

(no subject)

 I wasn't baby crazy when I got here in September, I swear. Is it 'cause spring is here? Is it 'cause I've found a guy I would gladly give up everything for? Is this biological clock thing not actually bullshit? Lori and I spent a while at lunch talking about having kids earlier rather than later and how awesome it is to make it all up without the help of Dr. Spock. Whaaaat the fudge. But anyway, I don't need to worry about that just yet. 


Soooo an update? Je ne sais pas, there are so many things! Sweeney nearly killed me, I've worked extreme hours before and seen sunrise from the other end at a venue before, but never as the only one doing my job. It's the closest I've ever been to having an eating disorder before-- everything was so stressed and short on time that leaving the theatre to eat or sleep seemed like a waste. I'm pretty sure those were 60-80 hour weeks from the beginning of January through the production. I'm still burnt out from it, and it's been a month. Not a great attitude to kick off a new term. On the other hand, this term looks like it will be light a fluffy. I'm teaching Stagecraft and a one student lighting/sound design course, which makes me realize how impatient I can be with other peoples' thought processes.

I went with Mollie and the music department to Canada for the first week of break. Straight out of dance onto a bus. Or... a van. We were a few people too many to all fit on the charter bus, so I went in the van with a few kids and all the celli. It was pretty lovely, we went to Montreal, Ile-aux-coudres, and Old Quebec City. Lotta French, lotta culture, lotta music, and lotta kids. And my first time out of the country, what an introspective journey! I missed Jonny like mad, it's still insane how electric it is.

I went back to the shop for a couple days after Canada, and once I gave them my availability for the week they said "oh good, you're going on tour!" Whaaaat? And thus ensued my first rock tour. Granted it's the Boston Legends shinding, so it was all conventionals and a four show stint, but definitely a great intro to the trials, tribulations, and time pressure of a tour. There's another leg going out in April with a slightly different billing and rig, so I'm rearranging some classes and dorm duty so I can go. Every job posting that looks juicy to me requires touring experience, so here's a start.

One of the stops was at the Music Hall in Portsmouth, where Allison had taken me for a wee tour and introduction back in December. Since I had a chance to work with them, they bumped me up on the overhire list. I've got a couple hours coming up next week, which is an awesome connection to have. I miss working in a road house. Just being there made me all reminiscent. I might've gotten one of the kids onto the show call too, for wardrobe. We'll see.

Me and Jonny are up to two goats, a housebroken mini-pig, and some chickens. Now all we need is a yard. It is ridiculous. Good grief I love him. Off to see him play in Cambridge!

Feb. 14th, 2011

(no subject)

I miss being a wee lackey who's job it is to execute what other people point to. I've been working nearly nonstop to get my stuff done, but it's lonely when I have to crack my own whip. Something about this production seems so sterile and detached. I usually get really into whatever I'm working on because the atmosphere just gets into my bones, but this entire process has seemed so odd that I've been completely thrown. Obviously it's a big undertaking, but that stress and pressure is supposed to at least excite you before burning you out entirely. Dress rehearsal went well though, which was a bit of a shock. Almost didn't make it through dorm duty last night 'cause I sat down and suddenly my brain was gone-- not only am I LD for this one, but I've become sound designer and engineer (HA! Thank goodness for that sound workshop back in the day) and props person extraordinaire. This is the last time I brave a Market Basket on a Sunday morning to buy two cases of Table Talk apple pies. Ugh. A hunk of ice just melted off the roof of the theatre and came down like a gunshot. External doorways around here are treacherous in thawing weather.

Just found an old burned CD in my office desk drawer labeled "The Queen Wants to Be a DJ." Put it in for kicks, and it's pretty fun techno. I wish I knew where it came from. It seems to be great for groovin' and workin', for all the work I'm getting done right now. Ha. Maybe I'll eat this old banana that's been on my desk since last week. I'm hungry and it smells good. 

Speaking of bananas. Aw. Nobody's ever lit bananas on fire for me before this weekend. He texted last Thursday when Lori and I were pulling our planned all nighter, "I have a funeral Monday." We'd just talked about v-day plans, like ya do, but oh my goodness. When you ask a grown man who's funeral and he responds "my nana," it's impossible to not hear your heart break in two. I drove down in the middle of the night (after getting caught in a speed trap and being questioned about pot usage, inspired by my old pack of Backwoods in the glove box and caffeine induced shaky hands) but he made me dinner on Saturday, got me a rose and a card. Now, attached to this card with Snoopy stickers (Nicole, you'll like this!) was a leopard print key to his apartment. And inside the card was an aside-- February 14th is the two month anniversary of our first not-a-date-but-totally-a-date. And here, for once, I'm not the one noticing month anniversaries and making v-day dinner. When I climbed into bed next to him on that all-nighter-night, he wrapped his arms around me and squeezed tight, and said "I'm going to love you forever." Terrifying, yes, but oh my lord, so very very amazing.

Feb. 4th, 2011

(no subject)

 You know it's good when facilities have to take a jackhammer to the ice on the theatre's awnings. These awnings are the only things separating us from certain death upon leaving the building at any given time. A huge avalanche last night nearly took out Lori's car, and gigantic chucks of roof ice were left all over the place (and will probably freeze onto the already hazardous tundra). On the other hand, I have the motherfuckin' cleanest parking spot known to man right now, and if anyone tries to steal it I will cut them. I should get a folding chair out there to save my spot, a la Boston.

Everything that was supposed to ship for Sweeney has been held up by the ridiculous weather, so hopefully it all gets here in time. Mollie helped me make propr meat pies out of model magic and newspaper-- they look disgusting.

Time to go clean like a mofo and put kitty free sheets on the bed, for the boy is coming to visit! And alas, I loveth him.

Jan. 31st, 2011

(no subject)

 My life continues to be a big floppy cotton candy pink cloud of "squeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!" I know this because every time Mollie asks "how was your weekend" or "how's the boy" or "how're you doing today," this big goofy grin creeps its way onto my face no matter how lame a day I'm having, and she rolls her eyes, whacks my shoulder, and laughs at me.

It's kind of ridiculous that this feeling is even possible. I'm Bridget Jones, and he's my Marc Darcy. But less brooding, and with a beard. He loves me just the way I am. He'd love me even if I was a stripper. It's been what, a month and a half? And we're gonna be together for ever. 

I woke up Thursday with a lame cough that turned into a full blown sinus snot induced haze for the weekend. I went down to his place Saturday and instead of being bummed that I was boring, he made me cream of mushroom soup and chamomile tea, and he curled up around me for an hour before he had to go to work at midnight. He tucked me in and kissed me on the forehead, told me he loved me. And when he got home three hours later he wasn't exhausted or crotchety or so worn out that he fell over (though he totally was), instead he was ecstatic that He came home from work to me, warm in his bed. He's perfect. We can say stupid ridiculous things in silly ridiculous voices and it's amazing. There's no straight man here. I love that kind of freedom. He really does love me just the way I am, and I know because I can be myself around him, completely. He humors me and dotes on me anyway. And y'know what? I love him even more. I'd do anything for him... he's already inspired me to be such a better person.

Take this morning for example. I woke up with my alarm instead of hitting snooze for an hour and a half. I made coffee and did sit ups while it brewed, I'm actually eating breakfast! And in a few minutes I'll head out to the post office to apply for a passport, and then into the theatre for a hardy day of work. He says I inspire him... but I dunno if he knows how driven he makes me.

So goodness, there are a million other things going on right now-- Sweeney, possible spring break in Canada, awesome night of dorm duty/bonding time last night, hippie herbal remedies that are awesome, dinner with Jesseface tonight! But none of them matter anywhere near as much as the fact that I get to go to sleep tonight wrapped up with the only man I'll ever need.

Nov. 13th, 2010

The Girl Who Gets Shit Done

I'm a Norwegian dead guy's twelfth novel. In this one, the heroine plays with lights instead of computer code. And she lives at a boarding school. So let's see, what shit did she get done today?

She circuited all her deck mounts-- all the uplights under traps that needed cable run in and through and around the set. She picked up a bunch of Colorblasts from Port to set up for tomorrow's dance. She figured out how to rig up the chandelier, she wired it and didn't blow it up.

Ugh third person is for douchebags. This weekend's Exeter/Andover, the school gets hyped up and cracked out and plays football against the super-duper Andover rivals. Since the game's tomorrow, everyone went nuts today. I had to quiz the stagecraft class on lights'n'things and actually had to whip out the "next person to talk gets his quiz taken away" line. Lori even stood in the doorway and made her mom face to make them shut up. We're starting tech tomorrow, so suddenly everyone's little issues and projects become huge and awful-- Cary's out of town at his brother-in-law's memorial, so a few things have fallen to me because the poor guy has enough on his plate without worrying about chandeliers and broken trap locks and video projections.

I made Katie dinner tonight 'cause she got caught at music rehearsal and missed all food opportunities on campus, Lori insisted I pull her aside and offer her food (which of course I don't have a problem with) but the poor thing was tired and probably felt a bit awkward about me cooking her eggs and fake bacon 'cause that's all I really have in my fridge. Meanwhile, I'm on duty on the rowdiest weekend of the term. Girls everywhere in kilts, trying to hide the fact that they've been drinking. I actually caught one tonight-- the girl at the end of my hallway finally lost her beans and shut the door behind her and her boy toy. That was fun, having the young couple sit in my kitchen chatting with the dean of students while the rest of the dorm tries to check in. At least I didn't lose any kids this time.

Soooo back at Fisher at eight, I still have to write my "factual statement" about the occurrence this evening. I doubt a second beer would help much more, might tip the scales. On the happy fuzzy end of things, this is the first weekend I haven't gone home in a while. Steve's working super super late and I wanted to make sure I got to say goodnight... he took a minute out from the bullshitting outside to call me and listen to me bemoan my evening. When it struck me how much I really appreciated the gesture (still not used to being with someone who talks on the phone or values saying goodnight), I texted him "Hey, I really like you," and he sent back, "I like you too baby." Le sigh. I like this one. He's just so... reasonable. And sweet. We don't do a whole lot of outward doting, but he sent me home Monday morning with a couple of sunflowers and checks in.

It's well past bedtime, but this statement needs to be sent out and my brain is fuzzy and my cat is cuddly. Sleep soon. Another cookie for now.

Sep. 21st, 2010


It smells like someone's lit their fireplace outside my window. Or... skylight. Today was perfect sweater weather-- warm in the sun and nippy in the shade. Nori and I chatted outside the library and basked for a couple minutes before grabbing lunch.

I did a couple quick watercolors for the production meeting today. Despite my feeling completely unprepared, it turned out that I had all my bases covered and more, I have a chance to ask questions now that usually haven't come up 'til the day before tech. How do post-apocalyptic cult ceremony Birnham Woods approach MacBeth's castle? I don't know yet, but apparently I have more ideas than the director, so we're good.

Going home for the weekend was nice, since I hadn't been home since Labor Day it felt like I'd actually been away for a while. Granted, it was less than 14 days, but not by much, and I was in RI for less than 48 hours. I grabbed lunch with Sean, grabbed groceries with Nick, and made dinner for Steve, and I got to give Mimi and my dad their birthday on the day of and the day before respectively. So... not bad for a short weekend in the area. I'm pretty bummed that I didn't get to see Ben, but he was working hardcore and someday I'll make him come up here to visit.

The dorm head's hubby invited me to go play with the Portsmouth Symphony. I was superfreakinjazzed about it until I looked up the concert dates and found that the first one's exactly the same date and time as our Sunday MacB tech. We even finagled the schedule, but Cary's going out of town for a memorial service that weekend, and with the amount of projections we're looking to do, it would probably end badly if neither of us were there. After all, I am here for the T&D department. But arghhhhhhh Shostakovich! I'm playing with the school orchestra just for kicks, the kids are all immensely talented. The ensemble feels young though... it just feels like a high school ensemble. It's still a great time though. Mollie gets out of Glee Club rehearsal at the same time, so it's optimal for a pint of Ben & Jerry's and coffee. Last week the Grill cashier got all embarrassed when we told her we were faculty. She assumed we were students and charged us for the coffee. It was pretty sweet, she ended up giving us the cups for free, she was blushing so bad.

This place is starting to feel more normal, more like I'm supposed to be here. The girl who stage manages asked me for help with her portfolio and we've been chatting in passing. It's nice to do that sort of thing, I forget how normal it feels to do that, and how weird it is when you don't for a month or so.

And why is time flying like this? It's already almost October. We've been here a month already. Maybe it's because we're only on the second week of classes. I get homesick in silly little ways recently, and it's always worst the day after I get back from RI. When I get here it's putting my bag away and curling up with Janice, but the day after that it's wanting some big arms and a goofy little sister. We made pie and mulled cider at Abby's yesterday. Certainly not the same as our cider parties on Fern, but a step in the right direction. It smelled right and we sad around chatting about work and stuff. A step in the right direction, towards feeling at home here.

Sep. 11th, 2010

(no subject)

Oh hai. I'm in New Hampshire. I have 60 new little sisters for the next school year. My one class has four boys in it, and the crew is about seven strong and all girls. My apartment's cozy enough, but for all the hundreds of people on this campus I have yet to find the kind of company I'm craving. I went home for labor day weekend and spent most of the time with Steve-- it was super nice to actually spend two days in a row with him (it didn't happen all summer) but I think it made coming back up here even worse.

I guess this is the first time I've really dealt with homesickness like this. I can call and chat and instant message all I want, but it's not the same as smoking cigars on the porch or chilling with Nick or getting home from a long day of work and feeling like I have a solid way about my self. Sure I worked too much this summer, but I had a super sense of purpose and community around. I'm sure this place will feel like home soon, but it's been a complete transplantation and living alone doesn't suit me at all. Not yet.

Steve's been really great about putting up with me, he drove me up here when I got stuck without a car and made sure I was okay before he left for the night. He hasn't once told me to man up or stop crying. He just pats my head and whatnot. We talked on the phone for two hours the other night about nothing in particular: the meaning of life; the state of education; the weight of a Source Four. Y'know. Stuff.

I'm here for the weekend to chaperone the dorm's dance, and my first night of duty is tomorrow. It'll be good to get into a routine rather than having random bits of days and nights free and not really knowing what to do. Everyone here is super friendly and helpful, so I know I won't be lost in that way, but it's still a wee bit threatening to be turned loose at a high school the size of my college campus.

Jul. 31st, 2010

(no subject)

Oh wow life has changed since may. I took a job at East Coast, where I've been learning a ton, working hard, and doing fun things. Doing a couple-million-dollar wedding I met a couple guys my age who went to berklee and are possibly more balls deep into lighting than I am-- I got to play around on a hog for a little bit. It was both fabulous and frightening to play with a new console if only because it reminds me of how different my conventional theatre background is from the rock n roll stuff I'm looking forward to.

I've been spending many evenings down in Charlestown with my new man friend; breaking up with jay right after graduation was kind of a sad and painful process that some of you were unfortunately privy to. On a happy note though, I now get texts at work that say, "fresh bluefish for dinner? We caught a bunch." He calls me baby and holds me tight at night, talks on the phone for hours and likes Terry Gilliam movies. Even if it's only for the summer, it's just plain nice having someone who'll fix your tire and then take you out for clamcakes.

Janice has been living at my parents' for a couple of weeks, we had to knock down the number of cats in the apartment. I think she's getting more attention there, but I felt awful having to dump her and leave town for a week to work. All in all life's been really busy and full of work, but not awful. I need to see my friends more because I miss them dearly. August 21st is coming up fast and that's move in day!

May. 7th, 2010

What a desolate blog...

Well hello spring.

I just sat through my last undergrad class. Whew. I only have a couple of exams left to deal with, then I walk and I'm outta here. Handing in that last tuition check was a rush, this is officially the last day they're accepting them in time to get diplomas for graduation. It's been an entire half of a semester since I had time to think about typing something other than an academic paper, so here's a recap. I always feel the need to recap just in case I lose my memory and need to remember how ridiculous this semester's been.

Our building got foreclosed on. Everyone who'd lived there previously who we keep in touch with is laughing at us. It is pretty funny, and the timing works out quite nicely indeed. Most of us were planning on ditching the place after graduation since we're all off to summer stock and the next thing, and with the foreclosure firm that bought the place, we're now getting $3000 per household to leave. It was a fair bit of bullshit to deal with right about now, but it works out fine. Ben, Nick, and Jay are looking for a three bedroom place-- I'll sublet Ben's room, Kevin will sublet Jay's, Molly and Nikki are in company housing for the summer, and everyone gets a break. The only rough part is going to be the merging of the cats. Janice, Icky, Roxanne, and Matilda are going to have a hell of a time with it; Nick's reaction is probably going to be something of the same.

For the fall, I've won myself a spot at a New Hampshire boarding school as their Theatre and Dance Intern. It's basically a dream position for someone like me-- one year commitment, apartment and board provided, health and dental coverage, teacher's starter salary, and a chance to try teaching; I'll get to design their theatre and dance shows, be ATD, assistant teach, and, well, try dorm duty. If there was ever the perfect way to find out if I wanted to teach, this is it. They also encourage cross departmental participation, I get to play in their orchestra!I hadn't thought I'd even get an interview with them, but a couple months after I submitted my application online I got a call from their TD saying they'd narrowed it down to me and two others. They put me up in a sweet little inn, took me around all day and gave me an extensive tour of the school. I honestly felt right at home and I had such a great time that it felt odd shaking hands instead of hugging my hosts at the end of the day.

Finishing up the school year has been quite an adventure. Scheduling the NH interview was nearly impossible with everything else that was going on. At the end of Spring break, it really hit that I wouldn't have a day off until I die. Pippin was an enormous project. While the rest of the state was bailing out their basements and wet vaccing their cars, I was hunkered down here in the office drafting version upon version of the plot. I worked closely with Christine trying to organize the damned thing and it was like an experiment on how females react under stress. But we love each other and that's all that matters. I got to spend a week messing around with an Ion (which comes at a great time career wise) and the rest of the rental gear and you know what? I think it looked pretty damn slick. I snapped pictures at the last dress/tech and printed them the next morning for my portfolio, I'm amazed they were dry by the time I hit the road for NH.

I got back from NH just in time to strike Pippin, play an orchestra concert, and load in Festival's Cinderella at Vets the next day. That was my next big thing: ME and Associate designer. I felt waaaaaay more prepared this time around than I did the last time I had one of their gigs thrown my way. I'd already reworked the paperwork, double checked the shop order, and prepped the show file. It helped a bunch that we still had most of the cues from their last mounting of this production, it set a pretty strong framework. I was also way more involved in this one-- I was actually there all week and Alan left me in charge of half the focus and most of the work notes. I'd like to think that my oh-so-charming personality and work ethic kept the union guys from disliking me too much. I haven't heard anything from ALPS about missing gear after load out, so it looks like I did alright. We could've used that extra day (if we'd loaded in Sunday)but what's done is done. I left that gig with a couple connections that are proving to be pretty swell-- I'm in touch with two area production houses where I can hopefully work through the summer and pick back up next spring.

That brings us to now. I'm lighting Opera Workshop this weekend (lights up and lights down is astounding to them, so it'll be easy. Jon asked me to SM the Festival culmination at the beginning of June, I've got a couple other recitals booked, and Fantasy Works should keep me busy.

This past week has already been a blur, hopefully I don't miss anything before I get to pause for a second. I've got an office to clear out and an apartment to pack up, and I think it's all going to be a good change.

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